Monday, November 28, 2022


Finding alone time when full-time RVing with spouse

Dear RV Shrink:rvshrink
Like most couples, my wife and I have occasional disagreements. At home we can go to different parts of the house to calm down, but it’s more difficult in our trailer. When we get into a heated argument, she storms off to the bathroom and stays there for an hour or so. She has a little electronic game in there and plays draw poker. I can hear it beeping, which drives me nuts. On a nice day, I just leave the RV and take a walk, but when it’s cold or rainy I have nowhere to go. Do you think this is a good way for her to let off steam? Am I overreacting? —Jim

Dear Jim:
I guess it depends on the size of your rig. If you travel with a Casita there could be a problem trying to take a time out in your separate corners. In a bigger rig it could be more convenient.

Everyone needs a little time alone. I’m a long distance backpacker. My wife said to me last year, “There are things I love about you that you never do anymore.” I said, “Like what?” She said, “Like being gone.”

Living long term in a small space can challenge the best of relationships. Having your own space can be a bonus many people do not think of when deciding on rig size. Having separate interests can be a good thing.

Arguments are not uncommon. Everyone handles them differently. If this is your spouse’s way of cooling off, get a pair of earphones or plugs and wait it out. A 25-pound backpack works pretty well, too. —Keep Smilin’, Richard Mallery a.k.a. Dr. R.V. Shrink

Editor: Here’s a video from and long-time, full-time RVers Joe and Vicki Kieva, on “Finding alone time while full-time RVing.”

Can’t get enough of the Shrink? Read his e-book: Dr. R.V. Shrink: Everything you ever wanted to know about the RV Lifestyle but were afraid to ask or check out his other e-books.



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Sam North
4 years ago

Consider a screen room. They’re inexpensive and don’t take too long to set up or take down, and they don’t take much room to store.

4 years ago

We have lived in our MH for 14 years now. Going outside is an option, but I often go into the bedroom since my husband won’t. Or I will sit at my computer with headphones on. I can watch programs or listen to music while researching, reading, playing games, etc.

Rhalne DeGraff
4 years ago
Reply to  rvgrandma

Same here

Jerry X Shea
4 years ago

We have heard many “we almost killed each other” stories. From day 1 we set parameters for living 24/7 in a small space. Yes, the bathroom is a great “alone time” spot. So is the great outdoors and walking the dog. On a rainy or stuck inside day we give each other “mental space.”
After breakfast we have “do not talk to me time” till lunch. Same for a few hours in the afternoon. We sit 3′ from each other while writing or on the laptop, cell phone, reading a book whatever we are doing and save “comments” on what we found, read or thought for dinnertime conversations. A TV headset allows one to watch/listen to TV while the other can read a book with no TV sound. With 12 years of fulltiming we have not killed each other yet.

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