By Chuck Woodbury
Warning to readers who get mad at me when I post anything on this website that is not about RVing. If that’s you, then please return to the newsletter.
This is about the weirdest, wackiest, off-the-wall dream I have ever had. It happened the other night. I have told a few of my friends about the dream. Without exception, I had to pause each time because I started laughing so hard. I mean, where does this kind of a dream come from?
Okay, here’s the dream: I can’t remember the entire thing, but it was about a singing contest that I had entered. In my dream, I knew I did not know how to sing, but for some reason I was eager to enter the contest.
As far as I can remember, there was just one other person, a man. He performed – and I think he did a decent job. Then it was my turn.
But, here’s the absolutely crazy part. I was not instructed to sing on a stage or anyplace normal. I had to perform inside a …
If you can imagine a drum roll, play it in your head now …
I had sing inside the mouth of a trout! That’s right, I was handed a trout, maybe about 18 inches long – a good-sized one, but not big enough to stick my head into. But for some reason I felt I could do just that and sing a tune.
And so, I pried open the fish’s mouth very wide, and stuck my head inside. It was dark and slimy and there were parts of gills all over the place. But there was some wiggle room. For some reason it was important that I not only sing, but that I move my head around with some kind of rhythm. I tried, but couldn’t do it.
Well, I did a lousy job. I was awful (and I knew it). I pulled my head out, and the two judges told me to try again. So I did. Same outcome.
But when I pulled my head out this time, the judges were very angry at me. They raised their arms and clenched their fists, and they were coming after me. I was sure they would beat me up. Well, I was having none of that, so I started running. My plan was to run to my college fraternity house, where my buddies would defend me. Of course, I last visited my college fraternity house many decades ago, so this was pretty weird.
Anyway, the dream ended. I did not get whooped. I woke up, and I was laughing. It must have been around 6 a.m. Gail was stirring next to me. I prodded her and, half-asleep, she said, “What?” I told her I had to tell her about the dream. She was groggy and not interested. But I told her anyway. As I got to the part about sticking my head inside the head of the trout, I busted out laughing so hard I couldn’t continue.
Then I finally got it out. She laughed nearly as hard as me. I told the story again, and we laughed again. It was so weird!
That is the silliest dream I believe I have ever had in my life. If you’ve had a really silly dream, please explain it in a comment. I wonder if you can top mine, about sticking my head inside a trout to sing.