Tuesday, September 27, 2022


Roadside Journal, Nov. 3, 2016



Drop my pants?
Gail and I were walking down the main street in Central Point, Ore., population 17,000, when we encountered this sign. Gail looked me squarely in the eyes. “You need to obey,” she said. “You must drop your pants!” I told her that no, I would not drop my pants. “I do not do that in public.”

Then I said, “Well, if you think I should drop my pants, then you go ahead and drop your pants!” But she said she wasn’t dropping her pants —”no way” — which made perfect sense. So we kept walking. But I was worried. I looked over my shoulder to be sure the cops weren’t coming to bust me for breaking some sort of local pants law.

Okay, I made up this story. The sign was in front of Central Point Cleaners.

Coffee-related things got my attention
I love the name of the business pictured on the right. Human Bean coffee kiosks are all over southern Oregon.

coffee-smThe other day, driving from Eugene to Medford on I-5, I spotted the truck on the left. A tanker filled with coffee? There couldn’t just be beans in there, right? So it must be filled with coffee! But no that can’t be! So what was the deal? When I got closer I could read the small print. It was a Pilot Travel Center gasoline tanker. The message said “Best coffee on the Interstate!”

Armed for flies


My friends make fun of me because of my rabid dislike of flies. If there’s a fly in my presence, I stop everything, and I do not rest until it’s dead or out the door (usually dead). I’m crazed. For example, say it’s Thanksgiving and I’m having dinner with friends or family. If a fly appears, I am virtually powerless to not stalk and destroy it. People laugh at me. I don’t care. It’s all about the fly.

Armed for flies with electric and traditional fly swatters

And so, a few minutes ago, I found myself laughing my head off at Gail. I was writing in my bedroom/office, with the door closed. She was in the front part of the motorhome. I yelled a question. “Quiet!” she responded loudly, which surprised me. It’s not like her to be so blunt. What could possibly be happening? I opened the door.

“There’s a fly!” She was holding two fly swatters and staring at a piece of tape on the kitchen counter. “What’s that?” I asked. “It’s double sided tape. I put honey on it!”

Honey-dabbed tape on the counter.

Oh, my god, she was attempting to trap the fly with a piece of baited tape!

I cracked up. It’s no wonder I adore this woman so much — she’s as quirky as me! But even I would not go to such an extreme to kill a fly!

We were both laughing uncontrollably, all over a fly.

And then, just like that, the filthy little creep landed on the back of a chair. Gail was right on it. Swat! . . . squished, gone from Earth, on to the great pit toilet in the sky!


My home in a beautiful light
I took this photo with my iPhone at about 6:15 this evening at my campsite in Medford, Oregon. Oh, what a magnificent sky!


Bad dog cocktail napkins!
Oh, this is too funny! I spotted these napkins in a store in Jacksonville, Oregon. I looked around at Amazon and found them there for $5.50. In case you can’t read the photo, the dog is saying “My name is No No Bad Dog. What’s yours?”



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2 months ago

Were you parked at the county park right off of I-5? We pass by there a couple times a year, but with free parking in Grants Pass at a friend’s house we haven’t had reason to stay there. My ex-BIL was also a most avid fly killer.

Geoffrey king
5 years ago

Regarding flies, spray with Windex and swat!

Tom Bender
5 years ago

Did your readers know that every time a fly flies away he poops on the surface he’s flying from. they also vomit. so if you’re wondering what all those specs are on your window sills and maybe in a public toilet or Outhouse that’s what it is and that’s the reason to kill every fly right away.

Tizzy Wms.
5 years ago

Please tell me how to subscribe to the roadside journal.

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