By Gail Marsh
It happens. Every. Single. Time. Within three short minutes of parking our RV, my extremely extroverted husband has already met the campers on either side of us. Before I can extend the slides to our fifth wheel, he’s made friends with the two anglers in the RVs across the road. As I’m transferring stuff from the truck into the camper, hubby is making golfing plans with the guy parked behind us. RVing with an extrovert is not always easy – especially if you are an introvert like myself.
My outgoing hubby loves meeting and talking with all the people we meet along our RV journey. The COVID-19 social distancing rules haven’t stopped him. They’ve barely slowed him down! He just talks louder – from a distance. Hubby immediately feels part of the RV park community. Even when we just stay overnight!
I genuinely appreciate my extroverted hubby. I’ve met wonderful people because of his gregarious personality. But I felt worried when we decided to spend extended time RVing in Florida for the winter. I envisioned myself whiling away the hours watching “Law and Order” reruns while hubby fished, golfed, and otherwise occupied himself with his “new best friends.” I’m not anti-social. Really. It just takes me a little longer to approach strangers. Because hubby and I have been married for more than 45 years, we’ve learned to adapt.
How introverts can make connections at the campground
Knowing our differences (and accepting them) has helped me find greater joy as we travel. I’ve discovered other kindred souls – introverts like me. I’ve witnessed the various ways they work to become a real part of the RV camp community. It usually starts with a note tacked to the RV park’s bulletin board. Because introverts tend to like smaller get-togethers or more one-on-one friendships, here are a few of the ways I’ve seen the not-as-social-type campers make a positive connection to those they meet along the way:
- A nurse offers free blood pressure checks to RVers.
- The guy with a ladder offers to wash your rig for a great price (or even for free!).
- A hobbyist gives knitting lessons.
- A canasta player offers to teach the card game to others.
- The tech guy volunteers to help others learn how to “FaceTime” with grandkids.
How about you? Do you travel with an opposite personality type? Are you an extrovert or an introvert? You can take a free test here to find out. Who knows? It might just help you and your travel buddy enjoy the ride even more! And please participate in our poll. Remember, it may take a moment to load.
Related:
Are RVers introverts? Our survey says “yes!”
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Same in our household- I will be the one quietly putting out the slides while he is making new friends and talk, talk, talking. Or I am putting them in,,, while he is saying goodbye,
Talk about deja vu, this is exactly me. My wife calls me the “social butterfly”, LMAO! Heck, I thought you had just written about me, lol.
I’m glad I read this. I’m the introvert and eventually grew to resent my ex(trovert). I’m glad this type of relationship can work for some it just made me sad and mad to always be the one setting up while he took off to be a social butterfly. I’d rather camp alone than be with someone and still be alone.
We are both mostly introverted, although my husband strikes up conversations more than me. However, we both are friendly. We don’t ignore people, we just don’t seek them out. However, if someone was having an issue, we would definitely help them. If someone engages us in conversation we gladly participate. We met a couple from Canada many years ago and are still in touch. We even met up with them a couple of times & would go out to eat or hang out. (Watched the Olympic US v Canada w/them & another couple). Also have a few couples we see each year at Speedweeks. Met them when we went with Good Sam. Have also gone out to eat with them. We will check in occasionally to see how they are doing. We love hanging out with each other so that helps! Part of the enjoyment of RV’ing is not being in one place too long so you can enjoy different places/people….but move on.
I was extremely introverted as a child/teen/y a. Having children led to interactions w/other parents/children. Becoming an “expert” in my profession and hobbies led to coming out of the shell more. Being elected to office in my hobby organizations got me more used to talking with /understanding folks, especially, due to my past, with the most introverted.
DH is now and has always been severely introverted. He considered cookies and soda after meetings to be a waste of time, and would always hurry (and harry) me up. Before the camper I arranged a stay at a bed n breakfast so we could enjoy a kayaking/canoing holiday. It made him really uncomfortable. He told me he felt like we were “taking advantage of our host, and infringing on his privacy ” when I took DS up to the main office to play pool, which was part of the amenities. I asked the host to explain it to him, but he didn’t take it in. Now after the lockdowns returning to more introverted myself. Truths change over time.
If you’re ‘tacking notes’ to the camp bulletin board you are NOT an introvert…!!! 👽
I would say an EXTREME introvert would not likely leave a note, but many introverts will quietly seek others who share their interests. They often have less interest in talking to folks with whom they have nothing in common.
Introverts need more time to themselves; extroverts need more time with others. Introverts are overstimulated by large groups, excessive conversation, etc.; extroverts thrive on the same. When our son was an infant, we began to notice he would get fussy when in a crowd, or lots of folks talking to him. When he was removed to a calmer environment, he was fine. Up-and-coming introvert.
In my work role as a corporate trainer, few of my students or coworkers would have described me as an introvert. On further inspection, they would have noticed I seldom accepted a lunch invitation with the group, preferring to use my time to re-energize; nor did I participate in the after-work drinks or social hour. Eight hours of people time was my quota!
I say both introverts but more like in between. Like having a sixth sense of whom you would chat with and become friends and whom you would keep your distance from. Having worked certain highly classified duties in the military you tend to be distant and that trait follows you through. I know my neighbors but only to say hi the distance is kept.
I am an introverted (mostly retired) software developer. My wife often has said that the only time I like people is when I don’t see them. She is from South America and is a social butterfly. Oddly, since we moved into our RV full-time, I’m the one who frequently sits and visits with the neighbors. In fairness, she’s still working so she’s in the RV a lot, but this experience (full-time RVing) has been great in getting me out of my shell more.
Too funny, Gail. I was often tortured by a partner’s desire for what can seem to an introvert like CONSTANT socializing. Introverts like small groups, and people they know intimately, as well as lots of alone time for their interests, while extroverts thrive on virtually any random gathering. As they say `opposites attract, then they drive each other crazy’!
I have some additional suggestions for introverts: forming or joining a book club, learning bridge and cribbage, and nature hikes with like minded botanically or geologically inclined hikers. Your suggestion to share one’s passions will always locate potential companions, and enrich the little corner of the world one inhabits.
I am an introvert. I like my own company. Just so you do not misread me, I am NOT shy. I can talk in front of groups. I have run a trivia game for 50 people. But still, I am an introvert. 😉
That describes me too. I also came to the same conclusion as Lucinda as I’m the one who reads this newsletter. My wife, the extrovert, just gracefully listens when I tell her about the more interesting stories I find here.
The poll results may be a little skewed. The introverts are in the RV on the computer and the extroverts are wandering around the RV park looking for someone to chat up. Ha ha 🙂
very funny!
This describes my mother and father to a T. My mother would sit and read, my father would know everyone in the park and be gone for hours telling fishing stories etc. I’m the introvert, can sit and read and tinker by myself, my wife will talk to people and generally be outgoing. I always am polite and will talk for a short time but really like my peace and quiet.
With the Pandemic, we can’t get more introverted
That’s a sad statement..
We agree with Diane. My wife and I are both introverts, yes we are friendly can hold a conversation but really we deal with hundreds of customers/ clients, so when we make plans to camp or bust out and get the hell outta dodge we do it. The trailer has food, essentials and go bags ready to go. That’s our way of destressing. Have a great day and keep on camping. Ray and Joy
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It’s interesting that introverts are over-represented in your survey compared to extroverts. You’d think it would be the other way around, but maybe introverts are more inclined to communicate through written means while extroverts tend to be less interested in reading and more interested in talking to others in person? I also think that this pandemic has been a lot easier on introverts than it has been on extroverts.
Re introvert/extrovert, I’ve never identified with either extreme. Surprised that wasn’t a poll choice.
I agree with you. Both my wife and I are comfortable in our own thoughts most of the time but we both enjoy being around others too. I’ve never thought of myself as either vert. It seems humans are always looking for ways to classify people and things but all classifications are artificial.
I don’t know if my job caused me to be an introvert but it could have brought it up. As a retired heavy equipment operator l sat in the cab by myself for hours on end enjoying my own company. In passing my fellow operators usually they would get a wave and smile and I would continue on my way. This practice has followed me most of my life. Short conversations are fine but I still seem to enjoy my own company. When we are a campsite, grocery store or Walmart a wave and nod is usually all you’ll get. I’m not unfriendly but people tend to “not” bother me and let me go my merry way. I’ve been married for fifty years and my three sons and their families all live on the same block with me and we get along fine. They have got used to the “wave”. Lol
We are not consistently one or the other. I find it depends on the setting and the people involved. I never do more than say hello to seat mates when I fly. I tend to do a bit more than that when RVing; say hello and talk as much or as little as they invite. My wife prefers to be gone from our campsite doing things, which tends to preclude much socializing with other campers.
As a clinical psychologist who has worked with the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator for over 40 years, I can report that behavior depends on the setting and people, but our personality does not. According to Carl Jung and most theorists, we are born one type or other. Parenting and environment can affect that inborn type to a degree. Extraverts can enjoy their alone time and introverts can become great socializers.
I’m a bit more extroverted than my wife but she warms up quickly some rarely have any anxious moments in the campground
I don’t know what I am! I find people fascinating! I could people-watch all day. I love talking to people too…. once there’s a reason. So in that sense I’m very extroverted. Give me a single glass of wine, and I’m the life of the party. Heck, I can even start conversations with random total strangers in a checkout line, for example.
But in our RV, I’m mostly inside every day, working, while hubby is outside ‘maintaining’ so he gets to meet the neighbors and strollers-by. He’s actually more introverted than I am.
I love quirk and get the biggest kick out of quirky people. After all, it’s our differences that make the world go ’round, yeah? What a dull, boring place it would quickly become if we were all the same.
So….. am I intro- ?? 🤔 Or extro- ?? 🤣
This is actually a tough question. As a retired corrections officer, I have made it a study to watch people before approaching them. Then I decide to start a conversation or revert to my CO days and begin to question them relentlessly. This is when my wife steps in and reminds me that I’m retired. Yes, old habits die hard. The state park rangers love me though. Extra help never hurts.
My husband was a LEO for 36 years, and likes nobody, well, not really. He can figure out what a person is all about in a matter of 5 mins .
I was in the bar/restaurant business most of my working life and I still like being around people, but my husband, not so much.
You can take the industry-standard test at Take the MBTI® (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator®) Assessment Online – CAPT.org
“The guy with a ladder offers to wash your rig for a great price (or even for free!).”
Let me know when THIS guy shows up!!!
After 20 plus years in the US Navy you learn to meet new people quickly but you also learn to let them go just as fast. As mentioned earlier by some former LEO’s, because of the exposure you learn to read people quickly which can be a blessing and a curse. It only takes getting burned once or twice to learn to read peoples intentions quickly and guard against it.
We’re both somewhat introverted, but I am optimistic and she is pessimistic. We balance each other out, so we keep our adventures realistic but interesting.
I don’t really know which category I fall into. I have no issue being in groups of any size, but I deeply appreciate my alone time and privacy as well.
One thing I do know is that I hate it when strangers come up and immediately start “interrogating” me about who I am, specifically where I am from, where did I just come from, where am I going, etc. My internal radar immediately goes up and I wonder what the heck they are up to! Makes me quite uncomfortable and I never directly answer those inquiries. On the other hand I would freely engage in discussion about my dogs, or my motorhome as an icebreaker.
So for the social butterfly extroverts, just be aware that others may not want to immediately delve into a personal life history conversation.
I say I am introverted and he is extroverted, but compared to me, most people seem extroverted. If you ask him, he says we are both introverts.
We are both introverts and happy to spend time together. When we arrive, I will say “hi neighbor” as we set up, but then it is usually into the rig for both of us. When we are in our winter grounds I am more likely to be involved with small group activities, games, genealolgy etc. DH is happy to watch TV and putter around the lot. We can both bend people’s ears if we get into a group situation, but we are also happy to just be a couple.
My wife and I work in healthcare and at the end of the day, we just want to be left alone. Dealing with people and their (real or made-up) problems just become mind-numbing. You resort people may like some occasional interactions, but most “campers” I’ve met want the opposite. Being nice and sharing a wave or a hello to new arrivals is being polite and to me, just a decent thing to do. But if I want to have an actual conversation with most people, it’ll be around a communal campfire or a club type of activity. When I’m in my designated camping spot, whether reserved and paid for or out boondocking, please respect personal boundaries and leave us alone.