Growing trend? Fly your pet in comfort in a private jet

By Chuck Woodbury
ROADSIDE JOURNAL
I remember way back, maybe a million years ago, when I was in college, I learned an important lesson in one of my business classes, Advertising 101. It was something like this: When you have exhausted your efforts to sell products or services to humans, then sell to pets — dogs and cats mostly.

I have never forgotten that lesson. Every time I see a dog food commercial advertising a delicious dinner treat for my dog (sirloin steak, for example), I start to drool with desire. I am reminded of my college lesson.

We know that more than half our readers have dogs, and quite a few have cats, with a bird or reptile aboard every so often. But mostly dogs. A lot of little dogs—the kind that yap while their owners are away stocking up on human and pet food at Walmart.

Okay. Getting to the point

All right, I shall move on. First, as the editor of this publication for about 18 years and then another 5 years as publisher, I have received dozens of press releases a day (yes, each day!). Many of them are pitching a story—some totally off-subject or just plain ridiculous or stupid. I get press releases about luxury hotel openings in Slovenia!

You won’t believe what I received this past week (but please do). It made me laugh. I recalled my “selling to pets” lesson in college. This particular email was a story pitch. It began: “I wanted to bring to your attention an exclusive story idea that’s prepared for publication should you be interested!”

Here’s the pitch, and, no kidding, I am being serious. The PR person named Mackenzie wrote: “In today’s pet-friendly travel landscape, private jet charters are emerging as the ultimate solution for discerning travelers who refuse to compromise on their furry friends’ comfort and safety.”

Pets flying in private jets to be more comfortable? Is she kidding me?

Okay, MacKenzie, you have succeeded in making me feel guilty for traveling with my little pal, Archie, in such a commoner way as in a motorhome. Poor little fellow. Am I headed to the slammer for pet abuse?

MacKenzie goes on: “I am reaching out to offer you an opportunity to explore the advantages of traveling with pets via private jet charter in an upcoming publication.” Okay, I am listening.

She continues: “From unrivaled comfort and convenience to personalized service tailored to both human and animal passengers, private jet charters provide a level of luxury and exclusivity that traditional commercial airlines simply cannot match. By highlighting the unique benefits and experiences associated with traveling with pets via private jet charter, your publication has the opportunity to captivate and inform your audience, tapping into a growing trend in luxury travel.”

A growing trend? Huh? Somewhere along the line I missed hearing about that. Sometimes I feel so out of it!

And speaking of dogs

Oh, then a week later, another email arrived from Mackenzie. This time she’s pitching Noise Canceling Headphones for Dogs. Yikes! For $199, Fido can be protected from the noises of the world. Oh, I understand that would be a good idea for July 4th fireworks, but the other 364 days of the year?

No, I will not write about either of these subjects. But, then again, maybe I just did right here. So, about the headphones: If your Poodle or Pomeranian needs a pair to calm down, here’s where to get them. They really are kinda cute.

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